R.I.P MICHAEL JACKSON
KING OF POP
YOU WILL ALWAYS BE REMEMBERED
KING OF POP
YOU WILL ALWAYS BE REMEMBERED
Friday, June 26, 2009
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
How to be a HFG on the beach
Summer is upon us and for most Fat girls this is a dreaded season. First you have to contend with the heat and lord knows heat is not a friend of the Fat girl. Then to make matters worse everyone expects you to go to the pool, lake, beach etc. So you have to go shopping for a bathing suit, which we all know is a chore because the selection available of bathing suits for Fat girls look like something most grandma's wouldn't wear.
Does this ring a bell:
I don't think even Angeline Jolie can make this look sexy. With all the odds stack against us how can we make the best of Summer and remain a HFG.
Well here are some surefire tips that will make Summer your favorite season.
Does this ring a bell:
I don't think even Angeline Jolie can make this look sexy. With all the odds stack against us how can we make the best of Summer and remain a HFG.
Well here are some surefire tips that will make Summer your favorite season.
- Find a good plus size woman's store. Now I can't stress this enough for the love of Yeshiva do not go to Bryant of Lane (you know what I'm talking about). Their collection is just sad and hella expensive. Go to the Ashely Stewart's, Rainbow, Dots, Torrid, Avenue, Cato, and even Walmart is coming up with some pretty good alternatives.
- Buy a really cute suit something that accentuate the boobs and yes the posterior. We minorities know the value of the a** and believe me a big one can be a really good thing. Be daring, if you find a suit that you like but you think you're to big to wear it, buy it.
- Buy a really comfy beach chair and an umbrella. It is too hot to be sitting on the sand and without shade. While I stress buying red clothing, looking like a lobster is not cute. So if your prone to burning please find some shade and some really good sunblock.
- Pack a cooler with some good food or if your Fat posse is with you bring grill to bar-b-que and have a party. Good food+Good friends=HFG
- Get in the water and swim. If you don't know how to take this summer to learn . It a very important skill to have and you may never know when you may need it. I love swimming because I feel weightless and free. It's a great feeling.
- Find a really good book or bring your MP3 and just veg out. Forget about everything and just enjoy the day.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Tips on becoming a Happy Fat Girl
Now that you know a little about me and my tramas (troubles and drama) I think it's high time I let you in on the secret to being a Happy Fat Girl. Here are some tips I think will help you on your quest to becoming a HFG.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Take these words and show the world just who you are.
- Laugh your a** off every chance you get. Do it often and do it loudly. It will keep you looking and feeling young.
- Once a week dance around your room naked. Put on some music and let that jelly jiggle. Just be careful not to knock things over, trust me I speak from experience.
- Buy a great bra. Being a Fat girl means God gave you great rack now all you need is the right frame work to show off his masterpiece. Remember there are people buying what you were blessed with naturally.
- When walking down the street, strut. I find if I sing "Stayin alive" by the Bee Gees or Beyonce's "Get me bodied" in my head my body just starts strutting on it's own accord. It really works, try it.
- Speak your mind. Now this little tip is tricky because at first people may give you grief because you are too blunt but after a while people will appreciate your honesty and start asking for your advice. Life is too short to have to watch every little thing you say.
- Order dessert when you go out. You don't have to eat the whole thing but if you want it go for it. Don't hold back. Just remember everything in moderation.
- Buy some bright, bold clothing. I am talking pink, yellow, and red clothing. Let the world see you.
- Get a pair of Cha Cha heels. If the drag queens can rock'em so should you!
- Find a Fat posse. This is a group of friends that support you in all that you do. Now thin people are allowed in the Fat posse as long as they are Fat-friendly. That means no negativity or recommending a diet and the minute the ask you if they look fat in something kick them out.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Take these words and show the world just who you are.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Fabulous and Thick
Now that you have heard my tragic story of how my fat girl cherry was popped. Here is the story about how I became a Happy Fat Girl. So after getting through elementary and middle school with lots of scrapes and bruises because I didn't take people teasing lying down. I was an angry fat girl and I figured to quote the Fabulous Ms. Mo'Nique if I couldn't be a stick, baby I could be a stone.
I had escaped all the kids I went to school with by going to a magnet school in the suburbs but after getting really sick and having to drop out of the program I ended back in my home school with all my tormentors. After my mom registered me I literally cried the whole way home. The thought of having to face all again was just too much and the worse part was my best friends were at my other school so I had lost my Fat posse. FYI: A Fat posse is a group of true friends that always have your back and see nothing wrong with good buffet. For the first couple of weeks I was like the walking dead. I hated being there and it didn't take long before I had to deal with Fat girl moments every where I turned. My personal favorite is when a group of boys would make elephant sounds I walked by in the halls. (Boom, Boom, Boom)
My only solace was my journalism class with my favorite teacher, Ms. E. She was an ex-hippie who really liked working in a inner city school and she didn't care that she was one of the few white teachers on staff. She always encourage me to write what I felt and she let me have full reign on the op/ed page. In her class I got my confidence back and I became more acclimated to school. The topping on the cake was I convinced my best friends to transfer schools so I had my Fat posse again. I was doing pretty good, I mean I still had to deal with crap but it looked like it might be slowing down.
Then one day it happen I had the ultimate Fat girl moment that lead to the biggest catalyst of my life. After brutal incident involving a kid kicking my chair from under me and making me crash to the floor all while making a crashing sound, I lost it. So I ran to my journalism class to seek some solace and thats when Ms. E suggested I write about how all the teasing and ridicule made me feel. I looked at her like she was crazy. She wanted me to put my feelings out there so that they could more ammo against me. Then she told me a big secret about herself and she offered to write a piece about her own experiences anonymously, of course. So I did it. I wrote about how hard it was to be myself when everyone else made sure to make me feel like a freak. I mean I was just Fat and no amount of teasing was gonna change that and when it was all said and done they were missing out on a pretty awesome person because they couldn't see pass the weight.
One week later the article came out and as I was walking down the hallways of school I noticed everyone reading the paper. I guess what helped is that right next to my article was a story about being gay in high school written anonymously, of course. When I walked into my first class of the morning I was greeted with applause. I was freaking shocked. All day people kept telling me how much they liked my piece and that they didn't know how I felt. It was crazy, I even had people tell me their own stories about being picked on. That day I went home and I took a long look in the mirror and realized that need to do what I wrote in that article. I needed to love me , all of me and to accept the fact that I am a Fat girl and I am better for it. After that the teasing pretty much stopped and I became the Happy Fat Girl everyone knows today.
I had escaped all the kids I went to school with by going to a magnet school in the suburbs but after getting really sick and having to drop out of the program I ended back in my home school with all my tormentors. After my mom registered me I literally cried the whole way home. The thought of having to face all again was just too much and the worse part was my best friends were at my other school so I had lost my Fat posse. FYI: A Fat posse is a group of true friends that always have your back and see nothing wrong with good buffet. For the first couple of weeks I was like the walking dead. I hated being there and it didn't take long before I had to deal with Fat girl moments every where I turned. My personal favorite is when a group of boys would make elephant sounds I walked by in the halls. (Boom, Boom, Boom)
My only solace was my journalism class with my favorite teacher, Ms. E. She was an ex-hippie who really liked working in a inner city school and she didn't care that she was one of the few white teachers on staff. She always encourage me to write what I felt and she let me have full reign on the op/ed page. In her class I got my confidence back and I became more acclimated to school. The topping on the cake was I convinced my best friends to transfer schools so I had my Fat posse again. I was doing pretty good, I mean I still had to deal with crap but it looked like it might be slowing down.
Then one day it happen I had the ultimate Fat girl moment that lead to the biggest catalyst of my life. After brutal incident involving a kid kicking my chair from under me and making me crash to the floor all while making a crashing sound, I lost it. So I ran to my journalism class to seek some solace and thats when Ms. E suggested I write about how all the teasing and ridicule made me feel. I looked at her like she was crazy. She wanted me to put my feelings out there so that they could more ammo against me. Then she told me a big secret about herself and she offered to write a piece about her own experiences anonymously, of course. So I did it. I wrote about how hard it was to be myself when everyone else made sure to make me feel like a freak. I mean I was just Fat and no amount of teasing was gonna change that and when it was all said and done they were missing out on a pretty awesome person because they couldn't see pass the weight.
One week later the article came out and as I was walking down the hallways of school I noticed everyone reading the paper. I guess what helped is that right next to my article was a story about being gay in high school written anonymously, of course. When I walked into my first class of the morning I was greeted with applause. I was freaking shocked. All day people kept telling me how much they liked my piece and that they didn't know how I felt. It was crazy, I even had people tell me their own stories about being picked on. That day I went home and I took a long look in the mirror and realized that need to do what I wrote in that article. I needed to love me , all of me and to accept the fact that I am a Fat girl and I am better for it. After that the teasing pretty much stopped and I became the Happy Fat Girl everyone knows today.
Monday, June 15, 2009
The moment my fat girl cherry was popped
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I wasn't always a fat girl for at least eight years of my life I was actually a skinny little thing, all elbows and knees. Then I got really sick with asthma and the doctors suggested that I go on a wonderful little drug called Prednisone. While Prednisone is very effective at relieving asthma symptoms it has one awful side effect, weight gain and gain I did. In the span of three months I gained about twenty five pounds and my face got swollen and puffy. So the skinny little girl was gone and what was left in place was a sick little puffy girl.
The kids at school had no idea what was going on with me. What eight year old can comprehend that the reason I was getting fat was because I was sick. All they saw was me getting bigger everyday and not being able to play with them anymore. They didn't understand that running hurt my chest or that rolling around in the mud might make me susceptible to a bad infection that my already weaken immune system couldn't handle. So instead of competing in hula hoop competitions or kick ball tournaments I was reading everything I could get my hands on and acting in the school play.
Up to this moment I had yet experienced what I like to call fat girl moment. A fat girl moment is when you realize just how fat you are either through your own recognition or someone being ever so kind to point it out to you. *insert sarcasm here* So my first fat girl moment came quite unexpectedly and was something straight out of those most embarrassing moments ever pages you see in most woman's magazines. Brace yourselves this is not a pretty moment.
I remember the day clearly just like most WWII vets can remember D-Day, most Baby Boomers can remember the day The Beatles performed on The Ed Sullivan Show, or the day the Berlin wall fell for most Gen X'ers. Yeah, I remember it that clearly. I have to say it probably is one of the most defining moments of my life. I remember it was raining that day because my teacher had to keep asking us to pay attention to the board and to stop looking out the window. I felt really sleepy because the sound of rain always makes me sleepy. We were doing math problems and my teacher asked me to come to the board. I can even remember the problem clearly 16 x 8 because I have never liked math and I was a little nervous going up to the board. As I approach the board I heard the class tittering, which made me even more nervous. I got the board, picked the chalk up, pressed it to the board and of course it broke apart and fell out of my hand on to the floor. I think you can see where I am going with this. My teacher tells me to bend down and pick up the chalk and when I do, my pants rip. That right folks my pants ripped right in front of my whole class.
While I was still bent down I heard it, my first fat girl moment, while the class was laughing someone shouted "Look at her fat ass". As I straighten back up I heard the teacher chastise the whole class and all could do was stand with my back to the class holding the chalk to the board. The teacher told me it was okay and that she would take me to the office to call my mom. What my teacher didn't know is I come from a proud people and I wasn't leaving that board until that problem was solved. So I stood up straight and got the business of solving the problem. The answer was 128 and all it took to get the answer was a pair of ripped pants and the lost of my fat girl innocence.
The kids at school had no idea what was going on with me. What eight year old can comprehend that the reason I was getting fat was because I was sick. All they saw was me getting bigger everyday and not being able to play with them anymore. They didn't understand that running hurt my chest or that rolling around in the mud might make me susceptible to a bad infection that my already weaken immune system couldn't handle. So instead of competing in hula hoop competitions or kick ball tournaments I was reading everything I could get my hands on and acting in the school play.
Up to this moment I had yet experienced what I like to call fat girl moment. A fat girl moment is when you realize just how fat you are either through your own recognition or someone being ever so kind to point it out to you. *insert sarcasm here* So my first fat girl moment came quite unexpectedly and was something straight out of those most embarrassing moments ever pages you see in most woman's magazines. Brace yourselves this is not a pretty moment.
I remember the day clearly just like most WWII vets can remember D-Day, most Baby Boomers can remember the day The Beatles performed on The Ed Sullivan Show, or the day the Berlin wall fell for most Gen X'ers. Yeah, I remember it that clearly. I have to say it probably is one of the most defining moments of my life. I remember it was raining that day because my teacher had to keep asking us to pay attention to the board and to stop looking out the window. I felt really sleepy because the sound of rain always makes me sleepy. We were doing math problems and my teacher asked me to come to the board. I can even remember the problem clearly 16 x 8 because I have never liked math and I was a little nervous going up to the board. As I approach the board I heard the class tittering, which made me even more nervous. I got the board, picked the chalk up, pressed it to the board and of course it broke apart and fell out of my hand on to the floor. I think you can see where I am going with this. My teacher tells me to bend down and pick up the chalk and when I do, my pants rip. That right folks my pants ripped right in front of my whole class.
While I was still bent down I heard it, my first fat girl moment, while the class was laughing someone shouted "Look at her fat ass". As I straighten back up I heard the teacher chastise the whole class and all could do was stand with my back to the class holding the chalk to the board. The teacher told me it was okay and that she would take me to the office to call my mom. What my teacher didn't know is I come from a proud people and I wasn't leaving that board until that problem was solved. So I stood up straight and got the business of solving the problem. The answer was 128 and all it took to get the answer was a pair of ripped pants and the lost of my fat girl innocence.
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