Thursday, January 14, 2010

A Happy Fat Girl's tale of forgiveness

My last post was about how to make your New Year's resolutions come to fruition, so I decided that I should share with my readers my own resolution for the new year. I want to be able to forgive people and not hold grudges. I have always struggle with being able to do this. I tend to hold on to things for a really long time but I have come to the realization the only person I hurt when I do this is myself.

You can blame it on my zodiac sign, my gender or my culture but the truth of the matter is that it is much easier to hold on to the past hurts than to let them go. I guess because sometimes those past hurts are all we have to remember of that person. The good memories tend to fade a lot faster than the bad ones. Think back on some of the people who may have hurt you in your life and see if you can get past the bad memories to find a good one. I bet it was hard to do, right?

So this year I have decided to let go of all those bad memories and also to get rid of the negativity around me to focus on the positive. As any good self-help guru will tell you focusing on the positive things in life will bring the many blessings your way. Oh, and if your resolution for the new year was to lose excess weight try dropping the negative people out of your life and you will see how much lighter you feel. Winston Churchill once said "a pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." Let's make 2010 the year of the optimist and let go of the pain, hurt, anger, resentment, and the negativity.

Monday, January 4, 2010

A HFG Guide to New Year's Resolutions

The new year is upon us and it is time to make those wonderful New Year's resolutions we make every year and unfortunately most of us never keep. Every year people tell me their New Year's resolutions and by February most have given up on the goals they set for themselves. The resolutions that fail the most usually have to do with giving up a vice (i.e. cigarettes, caffeine, shopping, etc.) or weight loss. I think the reason why people at fail at these goals is because its all about denying yourself something that makes you happy and often times is comforting. Besides who really wanted to give up their security blanket when they were young. Most time mothers have to get rid of it while the child is sleeping to keep them from throwing a huge tantrum.

So how do we go about keeping the goals we set for ourselves in the new year throughout the whole year?

  • Be realistic- If you set a lofty goal like wanting to do a triathlon but you hate working out, you are less likely to complete this goal because it is not fun to you. Try to set a goal that works in line with your personality. Instead of doing a triathlon, maybe a 10k walk, which is a more realistic goal and walks tend to be more fun and require less training.
  • Start small- Most people think they have to quit cold turkey whatever their bad habit is to make their goal work but if you take baby steps to get to the finish line you will make it there. I know this may sound cliché to say take it one day at a time but it is easier to achieve a goal if it is broken down in parts instead of trying to view it as a whole.
  • Get back on that horse- What usually happens with New Year's resolutions or long term goals in general is if we fall of the path to our goals we think it's not worth it to start over again. What is important is that you achieve your goal, not how you did it. Unless you used illegal methods and then thats between you and the law. ;)
  • Plan it out- Take your goal and plan it out for 12 months with a significant benchmark at the end of each month. Remember be flexible with the benchmarks, if you don't make it don't stress it.
  • Reward yourself- If you do need motivation for your goal visualize a reward waiting at the end of your path. You'll work harder if you know there is a treat at the end.
Remember no goal is worth making yourself miserable to achieve it. If you are realistic and you take it easy, maybe this year your resolutions can be a real solution for your life. Have a Happy, Healthy, and Blessed New Year.